(names have all been changed to protect the guilty...)

I was hanging out with my boyfriend Vincent, and my buddies Annie and Dane one night after Club KY. Annie's a cute little blonde goth half of a swingin' married couple (Coincidentally, her husband Simon likes gay boys as much as Annie does). Dane is a skinny Australian boy with impeccable fashion sense and an ability to gracefully shake his ass to any semblance of a beat.

Yeah, we're a little fucked up and we wanna get more fucked up, so we go to that liquor store on Mission, near 17th that will sell ya booze through their metal gate after hours. We go back to Vincent's apartment around the corner from the Lexington Club and start downing vodka-cranberries that none of us really need. We probably do some coke too. It was a while ago; I don't really remember.

Well, we all know why we're really there. We've all done our part to develop reputations of sluttiness and debauchery and I can't remember the last time that I've had sex with a girl. Besides, when do you ever get to have sex with your boyfriend, a girl, and a boy with a cute accent?

We slide into Vincent's bedroom and start kissing, groping, pulling zippers, and shucking clothing. All the boys suck each other's dicks. Annie sucks all the boys' dicks. Vincent tries to deny the next event. He wants all the machismo credit, but it was me that started eating Annie's pussy first. As far as sex with girls goes, that's what I like to do. It's a lot like eating boy ass, and truthfully, I can't fuck girls anymore. Upon insertion, my dick just goes soft. We change positions, which is never goes as gracefully as it does in the movies. I slip a condom on and start fucking Dane. Vincent eats out Annie. I'll write that he ate her longer and/or better. That should satiate Vincent's macho.

Then Vincent puts a jimmy on and fucks Dane. I have a pretty big dick, but Vincent's is huge and thick like a baby's arm. I usually enjoy watching, but I'm about over it all. It was fun, but sleep is starting to sound so much better. Annie seems kinda bored or annoyed; A common problem for straight women sleeping with gay boys. We all cum or we don't. I don't really remember. It's over. Annie leaves first, then Dane. Vincent and I cuddle up and go to sleep.

That night was just one hazy footnote in mine and Vincent's sordid sex life. I had put it out of mind for the most part until I ran into Annie and Simon at Trannyshack. I went to give Simon a hug and he just slid by escaping any greetings. I wasn't sure it was intentional until Annie came up and said the two of them were "a little miffed at me."

I figured Simon was upset because we kept his wife out late having sex with her. I wish. I ran into my friend Jason outside the club having a smoke. He knew the whole story and was close to all of the players. In fact, I'm sure that it was his having sex with Annie and Dane the night before that put ideas into my head.

It turns out Jason had casually mentioned something about my being HIV positive and Annie, Simon, and Dane all flipped.

See, we were all fucked up that night. I'm a nice guy. I generally tell people my status. I guess I didn't that night. Maybe, I assumed that they knew since they knew so many of my close friends and we had all just been hanging out for most of Burning Man. It's not a secret. I don't really have secrets. Maybe it was because I didn't feel like I was doing anything really at risk behavior. I used a condom with Dane and the rest was just oral. Sure, there is small amount of risk there, but if you are going to narrow down your risk that much, it's time to become one of those people that wash their hands fifty times a day.

Who really knows why I didn't disclose that time? I didn't and like I said before, I'm a nice guy. A lot of people aren't.

And now I apologize for the didactic part of this story.

If you fuck gay boys in San Francisco, know that one in every four is HIV positive. A lot of people think that's a conservative number and estimate it at closer to half.

If you fuck gay boys that shoot drugs, the number goes up. And how do you know if the boy you pick up mainlines? None of my friends knew I was shooting way back when.

So you ask the guy, "Are you clean?" meaning are you STD free and he thinks, "Yeah, I just douched; I'm ready to fuck," and responds, "Yeah, I'm clean." An easy route to HIV transmission.

You never fucking know. People lie. Or maybe the guy is telling the truth. His last HIV test came back negative, but that was three months ago and he seroconverted last month and doesn't know it yet.

If you are a gay boy and you get fucked without a condom, chances are that it's just a matter of time before you become infected. Your chances of avoiding it are higher if you top, but it's nothing to bank on.

There are some people that aren't worried about becoming infected. Maybe they've seen some of those ACTUP/SF posters, stickers, articles that say, "HIV does not cause AIDS." They seem believable. I mean, weren't ACTUP the good guys fighting for acknowledgement, care, and research in the '80's when Reagan wouldn't even mention the word AIDS? Our government and Big Business frequently lie to us, now we have a disease that targets, fags, niggers, and junkies. Hmm?

Unfortunately the assholes at ACTUP/SF have nothing to do with other chapters of ACTUP and their misinformation is now killing people. You can't trust every anti-government conspiracy theorist. Distrust of the Pharma Industry and our government is noble, but the scientific truth is HIV does cause AIDS and the current medicines work.

But, maybe that's why you're not afraid of getting infected. You'll just take the pills right? The pills fucking suck. They make most people sick. They cause diarrhea, facial and body deformities (50%), pain, and liver toxicity to name a few. You don't want HIV.

Maybe, you've been really stupid in the past. You've slipped up more than a few times and had extremely unsafe sex and you just got your test back and you're still negative. You've heard that there are those that are genetically immune to the virus. You must be one of those people, right? That's what I thought. That's what a lot of formerly HIV negative people think.

Anyway, I'm sure you understand.

Don't let it make you live in fear either. Suck all the cock you want. Swallow if you want to. Fuck and get fucked with condoms. Or don't. It's up to you. Just realize your possible consequences. And don't take my word for any of it. Educate yourself.

If anybody wants to ask a question, send hate mail, or whatever email me at jetchicken@hotmail.com